The Hidden Traps: The Trap of Expectation

I want to talk to you about one of the most dangerous words I know. Expectation. On the surface it sounds harmless, but in reality it is a wrecking ball. Expectations are the building blocks of disappointment, anger, and frustration. Most of the time we do not even realize we are carrying them, and then we wonder why we get blindsided by letdowns.

Think about it. When you expect something from a person or a situation, you are building a little movie in your head of exactly how things will go. Then real life walks in, throws your script in the trash, and does whatever it wants. You are left deflated, irritated, or angry. Not because life did something wrong, but because you expected it to do what you wanted.

Let me give you an example. Say it is your birthday. You wake up, and immediately your head starts writing the story. You imagine people remembering, maybe a party, maybe a simple text from friends. When reality shows up differently, the disappointment is sharp. Not because people did anything wrong, but because your expectations set you up for it.

Or look at Phil, who just lost 10 pounds. He walks around the house glowing, waiting for his wife Cheryl to notice. Cheryl had a rough day and is in her own head. When she does not comment, Phil gets upset. Before long, the night turns into an argument. Both end up hurt. What caused it? Expectation.

Here is the truth: life does not bend to the movie in your head. The more you expect, the more you suffer.

Takeaway: peace comes when you stop expecting and start accepting.

Extra Credit: Think about a time that your expectations led to a letdown, how could you have avoided that?